Twinkie Wiener Sandwich | “UHF”

by Blake Stilwell

A blog about food in media should start out with one of the past masters of ridiculous. And who could possibly bring this to the apex of hilarity better than “Weird” Al Yankovic himself? The Twinkie Wiener Sandwich is a delicacy that first appeared in 1989’s UHF, a film that was poorly reviewed and didn’t do very well at the box office, but has since become a cult favorite because it is actually pretty funny. It also features a young Fran Drescher, a young Michael Richards, and my favorite appearance by comedian Emo Philips. But none of that really matters right now, because we’re talking about food here.

The Twinkie Wiener Sandwich is fairly self-explanatory. And the preparation is covered pretty well in the movie. Slice a Twinkie down the middle, place a hot dog in your new “bun,” then a little bit of spray cheese, and you’re all set (I couldn’t see what kind of cheese it was, so I used Cheddar here).

My Twinkie Wiener Sandwich was actually really delicious. The salty plays off the sweet in a way that shouldn’t be right but really is. The texture could use some work, but really, the cheddar takes care of that weird preservative film that gets in your mouth from eating a Twinkie… and its creepy aftertaste.

My TWS

This actually did cheer me up after a rough day.

The proper way to consume this delicacy would be to dip it in milk (fig. 1), but seeing as my years of lactose intolerance won’t let me enjoy regular milk (the hypocrisy of my eating cheese isn’t lost on me… Lactaid does nothing for the awful flavor of cow’s milk), I opted to forgo that part.

Fig. 1

Fig. 1

I know what you’re thinking… “Sure, during the sleek, dazzling veneer of the 1980’s, Twinkies probably rained from the sky. But in Obama’s America, they’re a luxury some of us just don’t have!”

To that, I ask how dedicated are you to this process anyway? Twinkies are still available. The market equilibrium is just slightly higher. Ok, a lot higher. But nothing is impossible. Go here: http://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_trksid=p5197.m570.l1313&_nkw=twinkies&_sacat=0&_from=R40

It’s not like Twinkies are going to go bad on you anytime soon.

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